Cinnabon Executive Still Hearing It About "Love Guru" Tie-In

Be they goofs or gaffes, blunders or boners, we all make mistakes. This being so, you would think people might be a little more understanding when something goes awry.

Evidently, people of this stripe do not work in the Cinnabon corporate office.

I'm the first to admit that I booted it. Hitching our summer movie tie-in campaign to Mike Myers' The Love Guru, was less than wise, but does that really give my co-workers unlimited license to ride me like a donkey and take huge chunks out of my ass with their endless sarcasm and derision?

"Hey, Ted, got any other can't miss propositions for us?"

"Is it too late for us to get involved with Speed Racer?"

"As a Hindu and a junior marketing associate, I would just like to say to you, sir ... [fart]."

Put yourself in my shoes: This guy is Austin Powers! He's Shrek! How was I to know that America would stay away from this movie like dropped from a pig's fundament?

You don't think I stay up nights wishing I could take it all back? You don't think I fantasize about flying into orbit like Superman, counteracting the Earth's normal rotation, going back in time to that first meeting, and kicking myself in the face?

Oh, how I rue the day I hooked us up with that polished turd thinking it would help us penetrate the Asian subcontinent's cinnamon snack market.

Do you people really see the need to continue beating up on me when life (or perhaps it's karma) has already done such a fine job?

Here's an example: late summer, I'm walking through the mall with my kids, it's long after the movie has already tanked, but still there's Mr. Myers' leering mug staring at us from behind the Minibons and Chillatas. I pick up the pace, trying to make it over to The Disney Store when my oldest, Tyler, asks, "Did you work on that one, Daddy?"

Demoralizing? You bet'cha. Kick in the balls? And how.

So, how 'bout it, folks, can we put an end to all this? Nobody needs to have his failures thrown back in his face over and over. Phil, I'm guessing you'd rather not be forced to relive the "Fudgabon" debacle any time soon. And, Carrie, I know you'll happily go to your grave without hearing the phrase "Glazegate" ever again.

I boned it, I own it, I'm sorry.

Now, let's talk about who's taking the lead on this Obamabon roll out.

EMM